Pastoral Appointments

Question:: Our pastor is being moved after the congregation unanimously recommended that he stay to continue work he has begun. Can we do anything to prevent the move once the decision has been made?

Answer:A local congregation has no authority over pastoral appointments and the pastor-parish relations committee does not decide reappointments. The Book of Discipline states, "Clergy shall be appointed by the bishop, who is empowered to make and fix all appointments in the episcopal area...."  (¶430 Responsibility, 2004 Book of Discipline)

Complaints against clergy

Complaints against clergy

The United Methodist Church's practice is to respond to any charges of sex abuse or child abuse swiftly and with compassion for all affected parties. A clergyperson charged with such actions is afforded all the rights of fair process. Based on the nature of the allegations, the accused clergyperson is often relieved of his or her duties while the matter is resolved and always when there is a question of safety. Under no circumstances would a pastor under this kind of complaint be transferred, nor would the church cover up such actions.

"Ordination and membership in an annual conference in the United Methodist Church is a sacred trust," the 2000 Book of Discipline states in a section on complaint procedures. "The qualifications and duties of [clergy] ... are set forth in the Discipline, and we believe they flow from the gospel as taught by Jesus the Christ and proclaimed by his apostles. Whenever a [clergy]person ... is accused of violating this trust, the membership of his or her ministerial office shall be subject to review."

Such reviews are primarily held to resolve any violations of the sacred trust and to further God's work of justice, reconciliation and healing. Complaints about sex abuse are treated seriously and may lead to a church trial if charges are brought after investigation. In addition, church officials are committed to cooperating with law enforcement authorities in cases where the crime of sex abuse may have been committed.

Who sets policy for the UMC

Clergy Sexual Misconduct 8/1/2002 Who sets policy for the United Methodist Church? Only the General Conference can speak officially for the United Methodist Church. Every four years, delegates at each conference revise the Book of Discipline and Book of Resolutions. The Social Principles, in both books, are described as a "prayerful and thoughtful effort on the part of the General Conference to speak to the human issues in the contemporary world from a sound biblical and theological foundation as historically demonstrated in United Methodist traditions." The Book of Resolutions is not legally binding but serves as a guide for the church for reference, encouragement, study and support. CLERGY SEXUAL MISCONDUCT (Posted 8/02) The United Methodist Church has firm rules against clergy sexual misconduct, and church leaders are trained to respond swiftly to complaints.  The denomination's highest legislative body has called on each of its regional administrative units, called annual conferences, to establish written policies and procedures aimed at preventing sexual abuse by paid and volunteer church leaders, and for handling complaints that might arise about sexual misconduct. The policies are revised regularly. The denomination uses the term "clergy misconduct of a sexual nature" when boundaries and relationships sacred to the clergy office and authority are violated through sexual behavior. Whether suggestive remarks, unwelcome touching, sexual harassment, rape or other actions, such misconduct is an abuse of power. Sexual misconduct is a form of disobedience to the order and discipline of the United Methodist Church because it violates the sacred trust held by clergy. Some forms of misconduct may lead to a church trial and possible loss of ministerial orders. Some offenses are also crimes, and allegations of such a nature are to be reported to law enforcement authorities in accordance with relevant state laws.  In church law, chargeable offenses in instances of clergy sexual misconduct may come under categories outlined in the denomination's Book of Discipline (Paragraph 2702) that include immorality, crime, disobedience to the church's order and discipline, relationships or behaviors that undermine the ministry of the pastor, child abuse, sexual abuse, sexual misconduct or sexual harassment.  The Book of Discipline's statute of limitations does not apply to sexual abuse or child abuse allegedly committed after 1992. That year, the church's legislative body removed those offenses from the statute of limitations. The church's supreme court, the Judicial Council, in decisions 691, 704 and 723, ruled that this change was not retroactive. The church makes clear its opposition to sexual misconduct in a resolution adopted by General Conference in 1996 and revised in 2000, "Sexual Ethics Within Ministerial Relationships." "The United Methodist Church renews its stand in opposition to the sin of sexual misconduct and abuse within the church," the resolution states. "The wisest investment, of course, is in the prevention and training of anyone and everyone who may find themselves in paid or volunteer roles of ministerial leadership." The denomination's Commission on the Status and Role of Women provides resources and leadership related to the church on this issue. According to the commission, "Sexual abuse is a sexual invasion of the body by force. Sexual abuse may be rape, sexual assault, incest, indecent exposure, statutory rape, involuntary or voluntary deviate sexual intercourse with a child, promotion of prostitution, pornography with children, indecent assault, a deliberate violation of emotional integrity, a hostile, degrading act of violence." An executive with the commission adds that the list of examples is not comprehensive.

Hon Rev Dr James McCray Jr retired from Jones UMC

This Clergy retired suddenly from Jones United Methodist Church.  We would like to know from UMC why he would return to Jones in July and then retire suddenly a few months later? Coincidence? McCray divorced his wife last year.  What is going on with African American Pastors? We saw him on SFMTA and SBC21 websites. We tried to look at the Jones UMC website but we could not. Well here is a photograph of a UMC Clergy, Rev Dr James McCray Jr. UMC Clergy!!!

Strengthening the Black Church

what about umc clergy who abuse women who abuse their power? do you address that?  would you have such a clergy on your board?

Thank God Amos Brown is not UMC

Pastor Amos Brown is the kind of Pastor who exemplifies ministers and Servants of God as we read in the Bible.  I wonder what Pastor Amos Brown would say about clergy who abuse their power and who are guilty of sexual misconduct?

Comments from disgruntled Clergy

We received comments to our blog that were of an inflammatory nature.  We can only surmise that it is from UMC clergy and they are not happy with this blog.  This is not a place for victims to vent.  UMC clergy are definitely guilty of sexual misconduct and worse.  The General Conference has no control over clergy. We seem to make some people nervous with this blog.  Thank God for freedom of speech.  We know who sent us the comments and we think that this person is sinking and does not know what to do with himself.  He would prefer that we all admit that we are psychologically and emotionally challenged and therefore should be locked away because some clergy abused us.  We suspect this person has his own skeletons in his closet so he is hiding and would not disclose his name when he comments.

If you want to be true to yourself, tell us your name the next time you want to comment.  We have five men who may or not be sexual predators in the UMC clergy.  However you know if you are a sexual predator and you cannot hide behind that robe forever!

Rev Kelvin Sauls

The Rev. Kelvin Sauls, of congregational development at the United Methodist Board of Discipleship 

This is a retired UMC Clergy

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Heaping Treasures on Earth

Matthew 6

Giving to the Needy

 1"Be careful not to do your 'acts of righteousness' before men, to be seen by them. If you do, you will have no reward from your Father in heaven.

 2"So when you give to the needy, do not announce it with trumpets, as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and on the streets, to be honored by men. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 3But when you give to the needy, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing,4so that your giving may be in secret. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you.

Treasures in Heaven

 19"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. 20But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. 21For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.

 22"The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eyes are good, your whole body will be full of light. 23But if your eyes are bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If then the light within you is darkness, how great is that darkness!

 24"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money.

Clergy Sexual Misconduct

Clergy Sexual Misconduct 8/1/2002 Who sets policy for the United Methodist Church? Only the General Conference can speak officially for the United Methodist Church. Every four years, delegates at each conference revise the Book of Discipline and Book of Resolutions. The Social Principles, in both books, are described as a "prayerful and thoughtful effort on the part of the General Conference to speak to the human issues in the contemporary world from a sound biblical and theological foundation as historically demonstrated in United Methodist traditions." The Book of Resolutions is not legally binding but serves as a guide for the church for reference, encouragement, study and support. CLERGY SEXUAL MISCONDUCT (Posted 8/02) The United Methodist Church has firm rules against clergy sexual misconduct, and church leaders are trained to respond swiftly to complaints.  The denomination's highest legislative body has called on each of its regional administrative units, called annual conferences, to establish written policies and procedures aimed at preventing sexual abuse by paid and volunteer church leaders, and for handling complaints that might arise about sexual misconduct. The policies are revised regularly. The denomination uses the term "clergy misconduct of a sexual nature" when boundaries and relationships sacred to the clergy office and authority are violated through sexual behavior. Whether suggestive remarks, unwelcome touching, sexual harassment, rape or other actions, such misconduct is an abuse of power. Sexual misconduct is a form of disobedience to the order and discipline of the United Methodist Church because it violates the sacred trust held by clergy. Some forms of misconduct may lead to a church trial and possible loss of ministerial orders. Some offenses are also crimes, and allegations of such a nature are to be reported to law enforcement authorities in accordance with relevant state laws.  In church law, chargeable offenses in instances of clergy sexual misconduct may come under categories outlined in the denomination's Book of Discipline (Paragraph 2702) that include immorality, crime, disobedience to the church's order and discipline, relationships or behaviors that undermine the ministry of the pastor, child abuse, sexual abuse, sexual misconduct or sexual harassment.  The Book of Discipline's statute of limitations does not apply to sexual abuse or child abuse allegedly committed after 1992. That year, the church's legislative body removed those offenses from the statute of limitations. The church's supreme court, the Judicial Council, in decisions 691, 704 and 723, ruled that this change was not retroactive. The church makes clear its opposition to sexual misconduct in a resolution adopted by General Conference in 1996 and revised in 2000, "Sexual Ethics Within Ministerial Relationships." "The United Methodist Church renews its stand in opposition to the sin of sexual misconduct and abuse within the church," the resolution states. "The wisest investment, of course, is in the prevention and training of anyone and everyone who may find themselves in paid or volunteer roles of ministerial leadership." The denomination's Commission on the Status and Role of Women provides resources and leadership related to the church on this issue. According to the commission, "Sexual abuse is a sexual invasion of the body by force. Sexual abuse may be rape, sexual assault, incest, indecent exposure, statutory rape, involuntary or voluntary deviate sexual intercourse with a child, promotion of prostitution, pornography with children, indecent assault, a deliberate violation of emotional integrity, a hostile, degrading act of violence." An executive with the commission adds that the list of examples is not comprehensive. Child sexual abuse General Conference adopted a resolution titled "Reducing the Risk of Child Sexual Abuse in the Church" in 1996.  "Tragically, churches have not always been safe places for children," the resolution states. "...Such incidents are devastating to all who are involved: the child, the family, the local church and its leaders. …God calls us to make our churches safe places, protecting children and other vulnerable persons from sexual and ritual abuse." The resolution contains specific recommendations for local churches, annual conferences and denominational agencies. Extensive training about abuse and its prevention has been held within the denomination and continues. Churches are also encouraged to have a written plan for handling any allegations. The resource Safe Sanctuaries: Reducing the Risk of Abuse in the Church was specifically developed by the denomination to help congregations and people associated with schools, camps and other church-related facilities or events educate themselves and put protective practices into place. Complaints against clergy The United Methodist Church's practice is to respond to any charges of sex abuse or child abuse swiftly and with compassion for all affected parties. A clergyperson charged with such actions is afforded all the rights of fair process. Based on the nature of the allegations, the accused clergyperson is often relieved of his or her duties while the matter is resolved and always when there is a question of safety. Under no circumstances would a pastor under this kind of complaint be transferred, nor would the church cover up such actions. "Ordination and membership in an annual conference in the United Methodist Church is a sacred trust," the 2000 Book of Discipline states in a section on complaint procedures. "The qualifications and duties of [clergy] ... are set forth in the Discipline, and we believe they flow from the gospel as taught by Jesus the Christ and proclaimed by his apostles. Whenever a [clergy]person ... is accused of violating this trust, the membership of his or her ministerial office shall be subject to review." Such reviews are primarily held to resolve any violations of the sacred trust and to further God's work of justice, reconciliation and healing. Complaints about sex abuse are treated seriously and may lead to a church trial if charges are brought after investigation. In addition, church officials are committed to cooperating with law enforcement authorities in cases where the crime of sex abuse may have been committed. Sexual harassment Writing and implementation of policies on clergy sexual abuse and sexual harassment have coincided with the growing awareness of these problems in society.  "Sexual harassment according to the United Methodist Church is a sin," the Commission on the Status and Role of Women has said. This kind of harassment is described as "a continuum of behaviors that intimidate, demean, humiliate or coerce," as noted in the church's resolution "Sexual Ethics Within Ministerial Relationships," found in the 2000 Book of Resolutions. In 1992, the church adopted a resolution calling for the "Eradication of Sexual Harassment in the United Methodist Church and Society." The resolution was revised in 2000. "Sexual harassment is a barrier to hospitality," the resolution states. "This alienating, sinful behavior causes brokenness in relationships - the opposite of God's intention for us in human community." The resolution outlines legal and policy development on sexual harassment in the United States, the United Methodist Church efforts toward eradication of this problem, and work in the areas of international research and policy. The resolution also suggests strategies for United Methodist agencies, annual conferences and church leaders. Back : Backgrounders Main

Sexual Abuse within Ministerial Relationships

Sexual Abuse Within Ministerial Relationships

There is little doubt that sexual misconduct in church and society is a significant and troubling topic for our communities and congregations worldwide. We are aware that this unwanted behavior damages the moral environment where people worship, work, and learn. In 1996, the General Conference made a commitment to focus on sexual misconduct within the church and take action to address this brokenness and pain within The United Methodist Church. (The Book of Resolutions 1996, p. 128; 2000, p. 135)

Power and Responsibility
These words of Ann Smith capture the essence of this critical issue: "The abuse of power occurs when we use power to gratify our own needs rather than to carry out God's sacred trust. It happens when we refuse to own the responsibility of guardianship that comes with the privilege of power . . . until we understand that power is the responsibility to give, instead of the opportunity to take, we will continue to abuse it." (Alive Now, Sept./Oct. 1996)

In accordance with The Book of Discipline, ¶ 161F, all human beings have equal worth in the eyes of God. As the promise of Galatians 3:26-29 states, " all are one in Christ"; therefore, we as United Methodists support equity among all persons without regard to ethnicity, situation or gender. In our congregations and settings for ministry, we seek to create an environment of hospitality for all persons, male or female, which is free from misconduct of a sexual nature and encourages respect, equality and kinship in Christ.

Those in positions of authority in the church, both clergy and lay, have been given much responsibility, vested with a sacred trust to maintain an environment that is safe for people to live and grow in God's love. Misconduct of a sexual nature inhibits the full and joyful participation of all in the community of God. Sexual misconduct in church and ministry settings impedes the mission of Jesus Christ. Ministerial leaders have the responsibility not only to avoid actions and words which hurt others, but also to protect the vulnerable against actions or words which cause harm.

As our children, youth and adults come to worship, study, camps, retreats, and schools of mission, they bring a heightened awareness of the issues of sexual abuse, sexual harassment, incest, rape, and sexual assault. In the safety and sanctity of the church's settings, we as church leaders and volunteers can be confronted with questions and disclosures of sexual violence and abuse from persons in our churches. We as clergy or lay ministers are asked for guidance and support from vulnerable and sometimes broken individuals. As we enter these pastoral and ministerial relationships, we do so facing the complexity of risk, vulnerability, and moral/ethical dilemmas. It is not only our pastors who find themselves searching for good information and wise advice to share; it is also our lay and clergy, volunteer and paid persons who fill ministerial roles with children, youth, young adults, and adults. These leaders may find themselves needing information and sufficient training or preparation for their ministry. All will need an appropriate and affirming ethic to guide their own behavior within a ministerial relationship with a group or individual parishioner. Clarity about the nature and scope of sexual misconduct is essential.

Sexual misconduct by either a lay person or clergy person within a ministerial relationship can be defined as a betrayal of sacred trust, a violation of the ministerial role, and the exploitation of those who are vulnerable in that relationship. Sexual abuse within the ministerial relationship occurs when a person within a ministerial role of leadership (lay or clergy, pastor, educator, counselor, youth leader, or other position of leadership) engages in sexual contact or sexualized behavior with a congregant, client, employee, student, staff member, coworker, or volunteer. (Book of Resolutions 1996, p. 130)

"Sexualized behavior" is behavior that communicates sexual interest and/or content. Examples include, but are not limited to displaying sexually suggestive visual materials; making sexual comments or innuendo about one's own or another person's body; touching another person's body; hair; or clothing; touching or rubbing oneself in the presence of another person; kissing; and sexual intercourse.

"Sexual harassment and sexual abuse within the ministerial relationship" represent an exploitation of power and not just "inappropriate sexual or gender-directed conduct." Sexual harassment is a continuum of behaviors that intimidate, demean, humiliate, or coerce. These behaviors range from the subtle forms that can accumulate into a hostile working, learning, or worshiping environment to the most severe forms of stalking, assault, or rape. It is important to see both sexual harassment and sexual abuse within relationships at work, school, or church as part of this continuum of brokenness. (Book of Resolutions 1996, p. 130)

Those in Ministerial Roles
Both laity and clergy fill ministerial roles in our church programs. In addition to clergy or professional staff, any United Methodist may fill a ministerial role by participating in such ministries as:

• leading and participating in lay speaking ministries;
• counseling or leading events for children, youth, and adults;
• teaching and leading in church schools for children, youth, and adults;
• counseling victims of violence, domestic violence, or sexual abuse;
• counseling couples about marriage, divorce, or separation;
• filling the pulpit temporarily;
• volunteering to chaperone trips, work camps, or special events;
• working in Walks to Emmaus and Chrysalis retreats;
• mentoring;
• supervising church staff members; and
• serving as missionaries.

Survey Results on Our Progress
In 1996, the General Conference confronted the topic of sexual abuse and sexual harassment within the ministerial relationship. It called for the development of policies in our churches, conferences, agencies, and schools. It further called for training and advocacy practices. The General Conference also called for a survey of progress as a denomination conducted by the General Commission on the Status and Role of Women in cooperation with other general agencies.

Surveys of annual conferences and local congregations reveal that our progress in four areas is not enough: prevention, education, intervention, and healing. The General Conference continues to call for additional technical assistance in several areas:

1. resources for various constituencies within the church addressing prevention, education, intervention, and healing after lay or clergy sexual misconduct;

2. more training (entry level, follow-up, and advanced) for the various constituencies within the church addressing prevention, education, intervention, and healing;

3. discovery, development and implementation of models for intervention and healing in order to provide a consistent and thorough response when complaints of lay or clergy sexual misconduct are initiated;

4. development of a model for ongoing assessment of policies, practices, and responses of conferences in addressing clergy and lay sexual misconduct;

5. appropriate handling of the presence and involvement of legally convicted sexual offenders in local congregational activities and ministry;

6. opportunities for annual conferences to share their resources and experiences in responding to complaints of clergy and lay misconduct of a sexual nature.

Therefore, be it resolved, that The United Methodist Church renews its stand in opposition to the sin of sexual misconduct and abuse within the church. It further recommits all United Methodists to the eradication of sexual misconduct in all ministerial relationships, and calls for:

1. The General Commission on the Status and Role of Women to continue to convene and coordinate a cooperative work team to address the areas of prevention, education, intervention, and healing with regard to lay and clergy misconduct of a sexual nature. The team will include persons from the General Board of Global Ministries, the General Board of Higher Education and Ministry, the General Council on Finance and Administration, the General Commission on the Status and Role of Women, the General Board of Discipleship, the General Board of Church and Society, and up to four additional persons from throughout the connection with expertise in these areas.

a. The work team's expenses, including but not limited to costs of travel, will be paid from the existing budgets of the participating agencies.

b. The work team will report its findings, actions, conclusions, and recommendations to the 2008 General Conference, including proposals for legislation if necessary.

2. The General Commission on the Status and Role of Women, in cooperation with the various sponsoring bodies, to provide resources for leaders of lay events and programs within the church in order to help train and equip them to raise this important issue with laity (including lay speakers, lay leaders, Christian educators, persons in mission, leaders in Schools of Christian Mission, Walks to Emmaus, Chrysalis, and National Youth Ministry Organization events and training, and projects for young people through the Shared Mission Focus on Young People).

3. The General Commission on the Status and Role of Women, through the cooperative work team, to ensure that resources for laity and clergy in ministerial roles are identified and promoted by the participating agencies for use in conferences, districts or clusters, and local congregations.

4. The Council of Bishops to reaffirm its commitment to preventing and eradicating sexual harassment, abuse and misconduct in the church through education, training, and sharing of resources. Each Episcopal area will develop ongoing plans to coordinate persons involved in prevention and intervention, including but not limited to: district superintendents, boards of ordained ministry, boards of laity, advocates, intervention and healing teams, trained mediators, and staff-parish relations committees.

5. United Methodist-related schools of theology to provide training on the prevention and eradication of sexual harassment, abuse, and misconduct within the ministerial relationship.

6. Annual conference boards of ordained ministry to provide education (entry level, follow-up, advanced) for all appointed clergy and for all newly appointed clergy and commissioned members. Annual conferences are also encouraged to provide similar education and training for those employed in ministerial leadership.

7. The General Board of Church and Society to continue to advocate for just laws that will help eradicate sexual harassment and abuse.

ADOPTED 1996, REVISED AND READOPTED 2000, REVISED AND READOPTED 2004

See Social Principles, ¶ 161I.

From The Book of Resolutions of The United Methodist Church - 2004. Copyright 2004 by The United Methodist Publishing House. Used by permission.

UMC Pastor sued for sexual misconduct

United Methodist pastor sued for sexual misconduct

 

UMNS photo by Mike DuBose The Rev. Charles Boayue, pastor of Second Grace United Methodist Church, Detroit, has been named in a lawsuit alleging sexual misconduct. July 14, 2004      By Ann Whiting* DETROIT (UMNS)--A former probationary deacon in the United Methodist Church’s Detroit Annual Conference has filed a lawsuit alleging sexual misconduct against a conference clergyman. Plaintiff Joy Singer – who withdrew from the ordained ministerial office in 1999 – filed the suit June 30 in the Wayne County Circuit Court.  She also names the conference, the Michigan Area and the United Methodist Church for “negligent supervision.” Singer was ordained deacon in 1997. Singer, in a 20-page lawsuit, claims that the Rev. Charles Boayue, 44, pastor of Second Grace United Methodist Church, Detroit, offered to assist her in returning to the ordination process in return for sexual favors. At the time of the alleged misconduct, Boayue was chairperson of the conference relations committee of the Detroit Conference Board of Ordained Ministry. The lawsuit, which asks for more than $50,000 in damages, attorney fees, lost wages and the value of lost fringe benefits for Singer because she was never reinstated as a deacon, describes a relationship in which Boayue used his authority over Singer to arrange a series of private meetings.   According to the Detroit Free Press, Singer and supporters staged a July 13 candlelight protest at the Second Grace United Methodist Church to try to put pressure on Boayue and Michigan Area Bishop Linda Lee.  The lawsuit alleges that Boayue engaged in a months-long pattern of sexual abuse in 2003 and that Lee failed to properly investigate complaints Singer made against Boayue. The paper quotes Singer as saying that abuse by clergy must be publicly opposed. “I am coming forth because I do not want anyone else to get hurt,” she said. Responding July 13 to a request for comment, the Rev. Terry Euper, clergy assistant to Bishop Lee, said the bishop and the conference have not yet been served with the complaint.  He declined to comment on any specifics of the suit. Euper said Lee followed the appropriate “supervisory process” outlined in the Book of Discipline when allegations of misconduct are made against clergy. “The church always takes any kind of charge seriously,” Euper said. “We are concerned for the protection and welfare of people.” He also said the results of the church investigation were “non-conclusive and conflicting.” Euper said when the conference and other defendants have been served, the suit will be turned over to the appropriate insurance carriers, who will do a separate investigation and name legal counsel to proceed. Conference Chancellor Renard Kolasa will assist church leaders in understanding the legal process. He will also help the attorney for the insurance carrier to understand United Methodist polity. In a July 13 interview with the Michigan Christian Advocate, Boayue said he could not comment on the lawsuit “because of the nature of the allegations and the seriousness of the charges.” Boayue said the church’s supervisory process found Singer’s charges not to be “substantiated.” He concluded, “We will have to defend ourselves in the appropriate places.” Boayue was a delegate to the 2004 General Conference and was elected in May as chairperson of the Detroit Conference Board of Ordained Ministry. *Whiting is the editor of the Michigan Christian Advocate, the newspaper of the Detroit and West Michigan annual conferences. News media contact: Linda Green, Nashville, Tenn., (615) 742-5470 ornewsdesk@umcom.org

CHILD OF THE UNIVERSE

I did not think that I would ever say this but I am terrified of all clergy.  I see them differently and I do not admire them as I used to.  Most times, I listen to a sermon and I wonder if they practice what they preach.  I know this is not true about all clergy.  I know there are some there who get a bad name because of a few bad apples.  But unless the church, their fellow colleagues and parishioners take a stand against clergy abusing their power and sexually abusing not only parishioners but also people outside the church, this abuse would continue.  The Church should hold these CLERGY more accountable.

I do believe that most sociopaths hide under the cloak to practice their sociopath tendencies.  It is not difficult to be swept off your feet by a charismatic clergy who flatters you and convinces you to violate your marriage vows or his.

Beware of the clergy who are sociopaths.  You would not be able to tell them apart as they are one and the same.

Once you know that the person that you think you love is not just a Pastor but a sociopath, avoid him at all costs.  Do not try to save yourself and analyse what just happened to you.  Move to Antarctica if you have to, but end it immediately with that person.  Chances are that he already has someone else and only wants you around to control, to abuse and to humiliate.  You are not alone in this.  There are countless women out there who have been abused in this way.  Some remain silent.  Others share their pain to help prevent it from happening to you.  Please be gentle to yourself, YOU ARE A CHILD OF THE UNIVERSE!

Clergy Sociopath Qualities

SOCIOPATH: (hope this will help, and if you are, get help) 
* Glibness/Superficial Charm 
* Manipulative and Cunning 
* Grandiose Sense of Self 
* Pathological Lying 
* Lack of remorse, shame or guilt 
* Shallow emotions 
* Incapacity for love 
* Need for stimulation 
* Callousness/Lack of empathy 
* Poor Behavioral controls/Impulsive Nature 
* Early Behavior Problems/Juvenile Delinquency 
* Promiscuous Behavior/Infidelity 
* Lack of Realistic Life Plan/Parasitic Lifestyle 
* Criminal or Entreprenturial Versatility 

Another definition: MORAL INSANITY 

If you know anyone who exhibits these behavior patterns, especially someone in a leadership position, stay as far away from them as you can.

Thirteen Rules for Dealing with Clergy Socipaths

How to Handle the Religous Sociopath

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Dr. Stout writes, "Socipaths are not few and far between. On the contrary, they make up a significant portion of our population.   … For any individual living in the Western world to get all the way through life without knowing at least one such person, in some capacity or other, is virtually impossible.   People without conscience experience emotions very differently from you and me, and they do not experience love at all, or any other kind of positive attachment to their fellow human beings.   This deficit, which is hard even to ponder, reduces life to an endless game of attempted domination over other people.   Sometimes sociopaths are physically violent… .   Often they are not, preferring to "win" over others by raiding the business world, or the professions, or government- or simply by exploiting one person at a time in parasitic relationships… . " She outlines Thirteen Rules for Dealing with Sociopaths in Everyday Life.   I’ll share those rules here and apply them to the Christian context.   You can also think about these rules and how they apply to your own Christian context.

1.   The first rule involves the bitter pill of accepting that some people literally have no conscience.   These people do not often look like Charles Manson or a Ferengi bartender.   They look like us.  

-  This is especially true in the church, which is a community of sinners bound together by the grace and sacrifice of Jesus Christ.   It is important to remember that the church is a community of saved sinners, not a community of the conscienceless, nor a community of Evil.

2.   In a contest between your instincts and what is implied by the role a person has taken on- educator, doctor, leader, animal lover, humanist, parent- go with your instincts.  

-   It is stunning the extent to which Christians forgo what they know to be true, pure, and right when they get to sit across the table from a powerful and charming bishop, pastor, or seminary professor.   Studies show that otherwise normal and healthy personalities will do some of the most atrocious things in their blind allegience to an official with a title.  

3.   When considering a new relationship of any kind, practice the Rule of Threes regarding the claims and promises a person makes, and the responsibilities he or she has.   Make the Rule of Threes your personal policy.   Three lies, three broken promises or three instances of neglected responsibility are pretty indicative that you are dealing with a sociopath.   Do not give your money, your work, your secrets, or your affection to a three-timer.   Your valuable gifts will be wasted.

-  I often wonder why Christians continue to engage leaders who consistently bamboozle them.   In the Mainline leadership, it has become common practice to lie- well not always technically lie- but obfuscate the truth with artful use of words.   It has also become common practice to use "bait and switch" and do things like "thread the needle."   This is when leaders come to an agreement with a group or a person, and then use some obscurity in the conversation to achieve their agenda anyways through a "loophole" of some kind.   It is also when church leaders say, for example, that they are upholding the rules of the church while they actually have no intention to.   On the contrary,  they are working feverishly to overturn the rules of the church, for example, in respect to clergy standards.   This kind of dishonest manipulation is pure sociopathy.

4.   Question authority.

-   Just because your Bishop says it, doesn’t make it so.   You should always question a leader’s authority when you have the feeling that they are abusing power, people, or the authority of their office.   Do not go along with authority when you know full well they are wrong, and do not get tangled up following the rules they set down- especially if the rules they set hold the door open for evil and moral vacuity.

5. Suspect flattery.

-   I have seen quite a few pastors and lay leaders buy lock, stock, and barrel into a sociopath’s agenda because they have been flattered with an appointment to an office, or with the opportunity to sit in the sociopath’s "inner circle."   In fact, there could be nothing more insulting than a sociopathic bishop wanting you on his team.

6. If necessary, redefine your concept of respect.   Too often, we mistake fear for respect, and the more fearful we are of someone, the more we view him or her as deserving of our respect.   To mistake fear for respect is to ensure your own victimization.   Let us use our big human brains to overpower our animal tendency to bow to predators, so we can disentangle the reflexive confusion of ansiety and awe.   In a perfect world, human respect would be an automatic reaction only to those who are strong, kind, and morally courageous.   The person who profits from frightening you is not likely to be any of these.  

-   How many churches bow to the demands of a  denominational leader or bishop  they know is doing wrong because they are afraid he or she will not send them their next pastor?   How many bishops have threatened to remove a pastor, or take control of a congregation’s property, or have refused to provide qualified pastoral candidates to fill a vacant pulpit unless a congregation stops its protest against their radically sociopathic agendas?   How many Churches have caved to these sociopathic bullies, allowing their evil to have free run in the world?

7.   Do not join the game.   Intrigue is a sociopath’s tool.   Resist the temptation to compete with a seductive sociopath, to outsmart him, to psychoanalyze, or even banter with him.   In addition to reducing yourself to his level, you would be distracting yourself from what is really important, which is to protect yourself.  

-   In the American church reform movements, good Christians constantly engage sociopathic denominational leaders with the hope of convincing them to do what’s right, or in their attempts to save the denomination itself from becoming wholly sociopathic.   Conversely, sociopaths know that decent people will not be able to overcome them because we generally do not use the same tactics as they do.   The best thing you can do is to refuse to be a piece in the sociopathic chess game.   Instead, work to become the board upon which the sociopaths are constrained within boundaries and lines.   You can’t beat a sociopath at their own game, but you can reshape the field upon which they have influence and access to limit their ability to hurt you and others.

8.   The best way to protect yourself from a sociopath is to avoid him, to refuse any kind of contact or communication.   The only truly effective method for dealing with a sociopath you have identified is to disallow him or her from you life altogether.   Sociopaths live completely outside of the social contract, and therefore to include them in relationships or other social arrangements is perilous.   …   You may never be able to make your family and friends understand why you are avoiding a particular individual.   Sociopathy is surprisingly difficult to see, and even harder to explain.   Avoid him anyway.   If total avoidance is impossible, make plans to come as close as you can to the goal of total avoidance.   9.   Question your tendencey to pity too easily.   Pity is another socially valuable response, and it should be reserved for innocent people who are in genuine pain or who have fallen on misfortune.   If, instead, you find yourself often pitying someone who consistently hurts you or other people, and who actively campaigns for your sympathy, the chances are close to 100 percent that you are dealing with a sociopath.   10.   Do not try to redeem the unredeemable.

-   This is the hardest pill to swallow for many protestant faiths, particularly Lutherans who have gotten their theology confused and fail to properly distinguish law from Gospel.   Evil is not redeemable.   Satan is not redeemable.   God has made the choice not to redeem Satan, but to destroy him.   Christ redeems sinners, but destroys evil.   Christians have to be careful in fellowshipping and engaging church leaders that have demonstrated an insidious evil that we call sociopathy.   All evil is sin, but not all sin is evil- which is to say that all Evil people are sinners, but not all sinners are evil people.   Do not let evil people have a space or place in your church or denomination.   You will never change them and your responsibility to yourself and your church is to keep them from hurting you- which will only be accomplished through expulsion or excommunication, or simply totally ignoring them and limiting their influence in every way possible.

11.   Never agree, out of pity or for any other reason, to help a sociopath conceal his or her true character.

-   Think about how many children were molested because a Bishop felt sorry for a subordinate clergy person and hid their true proclivities, even to the extent of moving them to another place to conceal their behavior.  

12.   Defend your psyche.   Do not allow someone without a conscience, or even a string of such people, to convince you that humanity is a failure.   Most human beings do possess conscience.   Most human beings are able to love.                                                                                                                                  13.   Living well is the best revenge.

 

Thirteen Rules for Dealing with Clergy Socipaths

How to Handle the Religous Sociopath

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Dr. Stout writes, "Socipaths are not few and far between. On the contrary, they make up a significant portion of our population.   … For any individual living in the Western world to get all the way through life without knowing at least one such person, in some capacity or other, is virtually impossible.   People without conscience experience emotions very differently from you and me, and they do not experience love at all, or any other kind of positive attachment to their fellow human beings.   This deficit, which is hard even to ponder, reduces life to an endless game of attempted domination over other people.   Sometimes sociopaths are physically violent… .   Often they are not, preferring to "win" over others by raiding the business world, or the professions, or government- or simply by exploiting one person at a time in parasitic relationships… . " She outlines Thirteen Rules for Dealing with Sociopaths in Everyday Life.   I’ll share those rules here and apply them to the Christian context.   You can also think about these rules and how they apply to your own Christian context.

1.   The first rule involves the bitter pill of accepting that some people literally have no conscience.   These people do not often look like Charles Manson or a Ferengi bartender.   They look like us.  

-  This is especially true in the church, which is a community of sinners bound together by the grace and sacrifice of Jesus Christ.   It is important to remember that the church is a community of saved sinners, not a community of the conscienceless, nor a community of Evil.

2.   In a contest between your instincts and what is implied by the role a person has taken on- educator, doctor, leader, animal lover, humanist, parent- go with your instincts.  

-   It is stunning the extent to which Christians forgo what they know to be true, pure, and right when they get to sit across the table from a powerful and charming bishop, pastor, or seminary professor.   Studies show that otherwise normal and healthy personalities will do some of the most atrocious things in their blind allegience to an official with a title.  

3.   When considering a new relationship of any kind, practice the Rule of Threes regarding the claims and promises a person makes, and the responsibilities he or she has.   Make the Rule of Threes your personal policy.   Three lies, three broken promises or three instances of neglected responsibility are pretty indicative that you are dealing with a sociopath.   Do not give your money, your work, your secrets, or your affection to a three-timer.   Your valuable gifts will be wasted.

-  I often wonder why Christians continue to engage leaders who consistently bamboozle them.   In the Mainline leadership, it has become common practice to lie- well not always technically lie- but obfuscate the truth with artful use of words.   It has also become common practice to use "bait and switch" and do things like "thread the needle."   This is when leaders come to an agreement with a group or a person, and then use some obscurity in the conversation to achieve their agenda anyways through a "loophole" of some kind.   It is also when church leaders say, for example, that they are upholding the rules of the church while they actually have no intention to.   On the contrary,  they are working feverishly to overturn the rules of the church, for example, in respect to clergy standards.   This kind of dishonest manipulation is pure sociopathy.

4.   Question authority.

-   Just because your Bishop says it, doesn’t make it so.   You should always question a leader’s authority when you have the feeling that they are abusing power, people, or the authority of their office.   Do not go along with authority when you know full well they are wrong, and do not get tangled up following the rules they set down- especially if the rules they set hold the door open for evil and moral vacuity.

5. Suspect flattery.

-   I have seen quite a few pastors and lay leaders buy lock, stock, and barrel into a sociopath’s agenda because they have been flattered with an appointment to an office, or with the opportunity to sit in the sociopath’s "inner circle."   In fact, there could be nothing more insulting than a sociopathic bishop wanting you on his team.

6. If necessary, redefine your concept of respect.   Too often, we mistake fear for respect, and the more fearful we are of someone, the more we view him or her as deserving of our respect.   To mistake fear for respect is to ensure your own victimization.   Let us use our big human brains to overpower our animal tendency to bow to predators, so we can disentangle the reflexive confusion of ansiety and awe.   In a perfect world, human respect would be an automatic reaction only to those who are strong, kind, and morally courageous.   The person who profits from frightening you is not likely to be any of these.  

-   How many churches bow to the demands of a  denominational leader or bishop  they know is doing wrong because they are afraid he or she will not send them their next pastor?   How many bishops have threatened to remove a pastor, or take control of a congregation’s property, or have refused to provide qualified pastoral candidates to fill a vacant pulpit unless a congregation stops its protest against their radically sociopathic agendas?   How many Churches have caved to these sociopathic bullies, allowing their evil to have free run in the world?

7.   Do not join the game.   Intrigue is a sociopath’s tool.   Resist the temptation to compete with a seductive sociopath, to outsmart him, to psychoanalyze, or even banter with him.   In addition to reducing yourself to his level, you would be distracting yourself from what is really important, which is to protect yourself.  

-   In the American church reform movements, good Christians constantly engage sociopathic denominational leaders with the hope of convincing them to do what’s right, or in their attempts to save the denomination itself from becoming wholly sociopathic.   Conversely, sociopaths know that decent people will not be able to overcome them because we generally do not use the same tactics as they do.   The best thing you can do is to refuse to be a piece in the sociopathic chess game.   Instead, work to become the board upon which the sociopaths are constrained within boundaries and lines.   You can’t beat a sociopath at their own game, but you can reshape the field upon which they have influence and access to limit their ability to hurt you and others.

8.   The best way to protect yourself from a sociopath is to avoid him, to refuse any kind of contact or communication.   The only truly effective method for dealing with a sociopath you have identified is to disallow him or her from you life altogether.   Sociopaths live completely outside of the social contract, and therefore to include them in relationships or other social arrangements is perilous.   …   You may never be able to make your family and friends understand why you are avoiding a particular individual.   Sociopathy is surprisingly difficult to see, and even harder to explain.   Avoid him anyway.   If total avoidance is impossible, make plans to come as close as you can to the goal of total avoidance.   9.   Question your tendencey to pity too easily.   Pity is another socially valuable response, and it should be reserved for innocent people who are in genuine pain or who have fallen on misfortune.   If, instead, you find yourself often pitying someone who consistently hurts you or other people, and who actively campaigns for your sympathy, the chances are close to 100 percent that you are dealing with a sociopath.   10.   Do not try to redeem the unredeemable.

-   This is the hardest pill to swallow for many protestant faiths, particularly Lutherans who have gotten their theology confused and fail to properly distinguish law from Gospel.   Evil is not redeemable.   Satan is not redeemable.   God has made the choice not to redeem Satan, but to destroy him.   Christ redeems sinners, but destroys evil.   Christians have to be careful in fellowshipping and engaging church leaders that have demonstrated an insidious evil that we call sociopathy.   All evil is sin, but not all sin is evil- which is to say that all Evil people are sinners, but not all sinners are evil people.   Do not let evil people have a space or place in your church or denomination.   You will never change them and your responsibility to yourself and your church is to keep them from hurting you- which will only be accomplished through expulsion or excommunication, or simply totally ignoring them and limiting their influence in every way possible.

11.   Never agree, out of pity or for any other reason, to help a sociopath conceal his or her true character.

-   Think about how many children were molested because a Bishop felt sorry for a subordinate clergy person and hid their true proclivities, even to the extent of moving them to another place to conceal their behavior.  

12.   Defend your psyche.   Do not allow someone without a conscience, or even a string of such people, to convince you that humanity is a failure.   Most human beings do possess conscience.   Most human beings are able to love.                                                                                                                                  13.   Living well is the best revenge.

 

Clergy conduct

2 Timothy 2: 24-26

And a servant[clergy] of the Lord must not quarrel but be gentle to all, able to teach, patient in humility, correcting those who are in opposition, if God perhaps will grant them repentance, so that they may know the truth, and that they may come to their senses and escape the snare of the devil, having been taken captive by him to do his will

2 Timothy 3: ..For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away.

2 Timothy 3:6-9 - From their number (men claiming to be religious, but whose behaviour is non-Christian) come those creatures who worm their way into people's houses, and find easy prey in silly women with an exaggerated sense of sin and morbid cravings - who are always learning and yet never able to grasp the truth. These men are as much enemies to the truth as Jannes and Jambres (in Jewish tradition, the names of Pharaoh's magicians who opposed Moses before the Exodus) were to Moses. Their minds are distorted, and they are traitors to the faith. But in the long run they won't get far. Their folly will become as obvious to everybody as did that of Moses' opponents.

2 Timothy 3:15-17 - Remember (Paul writing to Timothy) .... how from early childhood your mind has been familiar with the holy scriptures(of the Hebrew Bible, now the Christian Old Testament), which can open the mind to the salvation which comes through believing in Christ Jesus. All scripture is inspired by God and is useful for teaching the faith and correcting error, for re-setting the direction of a man's life and training him in good living. The scriptures are the comprehensive equipment of the man of God and fit him fully for all branches of his work.

2 Timothy 4:1-5 - I urge you, Timothy, as we live in the sight of God and of Christ Jesus (whose coming in power will judge the living and the dead), to preach the Word of God. Never lose your sense of urgency, in season or out of season. Prove, correct, and encourage, using the utmost patience in your teaching. For the time is coming when men will not tolerate wholesome teaching. They will want something to tickle their own fancies, and they will collect teachers who will pander to their own desires. They will no longer listen to the truth, but will wander off after man-made fictions. For yourself, stand fast in all that you are doing, meeting whatever suffering this may involve. Go on steadily preaching the Gospel and carry out to the full the commission that God gave you.

San Francisco United Methodist Mission

We have contacted the San Francisco United Mission about assistance and support for women abused by UMC clergy.  We are not surprised that they have not responded.  We have contacted several UMC clergy regarding clergy misconduct.  We described the type of abuse that we know of, that was perpetrated on the victim.  One courageous clergy did respond, recommending that we contact the State Attorney's Office.  We, however would like to see the United Methodist Church taking responsibility for their clergy and exposing these clergy men who abuse women.  We hope that they would do right by the victims abused by clergy, even those women who are not United Methodist.  We seek justice for these women.  We would like to see the United Methodist Church revoke the orders of the clergy guilty of sexual misconduct.  With their orders revoked, the clergy cannot abuse their power and would not be able to abuse other women likewise.  If any of you know of any women who have been abused by the United Methodist Clergy and they are afraid to come forward, please direct them to our blog.  Remember you are not alone.